This is whatcha get when you get 'Green lights' at school for the whole month of November. TRACTOR SUPPLY HAT IN DA HOUSE!

Well good morning everyone!!! It's 4am on Sunday morning and I can't sleep anymore...... Ya see, I work 6am to 2:30pm now so my biological clock tells me to get up really early even on the weekends.... And that's the way the cookie crumbles so instead of whining about it and writing a letter to my congressman complaining that I think it's unfair that they require me to be at work at 6AM, I just put on my big boy britches and deal with it..

I did some 'wild and wacky' Christmas decorating this year! In the past, A simple wreath on the door is all the 'holiday cheer' I showed BUT!!!!! This year it's different! I call it CHRISTMAS DECORATING 2.0! I added some FLAIR to the wreath that I put on the front door, Being the handsome and educated consumer that I am, last year after Christmas I went to BIG LOTS, close out prices ya know, and bought a couple sets of LED lights for like $2 and added them to the wreath for some extra cheer.

Pretty SWEET huh!?!! Nothing says MERRY FREAKIN' CHRISTMAS like a lighted wreath on the front door! It's a WIN/WIN situation... I am pleasing all my hippie-like friends by using LED lights, saving energy, AND my red neck ones by celebrating BABY JESUS'S B-day!



OH I'm not done yet with CHRISTMAS DECORATING 2.0! Grandma McBride also gave me a ceramic tree that freakin' lights up!!!!! WOO HOO!!! SOOOOOOO Being the 21st century, energy conserving, saving the planet MOFO I am, quick someone call Al Gore, I replaced the old bulb with an LED one... And that ladies and gentlemen is how I roll for Christmas! I am one festive hunk-a-hunk of burnin' LUUUUUUUUUUUUV!

I hardly EVER talk about my place of employment BUT I am working with two fine ladies that I affectionately call Laverne and Shirley because their 'gonna do it' and I love being 'directed' what to do everyday! Is that what marriage is like??????? HA! It's all GROOVY!!!!!! Sasha has 'Nazi like' organization skills and Casey is a chain smokin', cussin' like a sailor kinda gal that keeps me in line or she and Laverne will kick my @$$...... BUT SERIOUSLY, They make coming into work enjoyable....


And before I go I want to wish the two people that actually read this a Merry Christmas and to all the others that say they read this but actually are just in it for the pictures, well I hope Santa hooks you up with a 'special' present. HA!!!!!! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

WHAT'S THE WORD?
THUNDERBIRD!

While in the men's room at work brushing my pearly whites, I was thinking about an incident that happened like 15 years ago. Don't ask me why I was thinking about it but I was..... It was the summer 1993 and my friend Boike and I were out at the lake, I think, cutting a tree down or something and he got a couple of bottles of Thunderbird which is a REALLY REALLY REALLY cheapo wine... I think he said something like "DUDE, I got us a couple bottles of Thunderbird and we soooooo have to chug them down." My thinking was WHAT THE HECK, WHY NOT!?! Kripes! We were young and, as I look back, pretty stupid too. So we start chugging and Boike has no problem but I have a very hard time with it. I can only chug it halfway before I start to gag..... it was some really strong stuff..... Fast forward 15 years and I'm STILL reliving it and thinking of what a failure I am BUT I realized that it's not made for chugging, it's for sipping on...... I immediately email Boike and tell him what I think happened that fateful day. He's not buying my excuse and he wants another opinion on the issue so we email his 'cabana boy' Kyle and here's a shocker, he agrees 100% with Boike saying that I let down all my peers by not being able to chug it, he also questioned my manhood........... SOOOOOO to prove to myself and all the people out there that didn't think I had it in me, this is for you!

Not bad huh!!!!! This old boy can still get the job done! I couldn't find any Thunderbird! Someone at the store told me that they stopped making it. I was assured by the clerk at the 'fine' convenient store that Mad Dog is just as bad. So I selected 'orange jubilee'..... As you can see from the video, it was like drinking orange flavored turpentine....

Not only did I chug some really fine wine, I also celebrated Christmas in October by being able to see MY TEAM, the Bills, play at the litter box, Bank of America Stadium!!!! This probably is the last time I see them before they become the Toronto 'Take Off Ehs'


Remember the tree that I cut down a month ago?

What to do with all the wood ????? Well I used it to burn up the stump. Plus it was a great excuse to pull the truck back there and hang out on the tailgate. Don't tell my mom but I also drank more than 3 beers! I'll explain the 3 beer thing later.

I don't have a picture of this because it was too dark but I made an 'AMBER' special for dinner!!! She was an old girlfriend, no she was not a stripper, who showed me how to make a simple dinner... All ya need is some aluminum foil, a pound of ground beef or turkey, some spices and a fire.... Mix up the meat and spices and wrap it in the foil and proceed to throw it on the fire and YAHTZEE! you have a dinner in about 20 minutes!!!!! YUMMY IN MY TUMMY!!!!! It was a great dinner with a beer!!!!

As for the 3 beer thing, When I go over to my parent's house, Catholic Kate, mom has issued a rule stating that her baby, Robert A McBride, can only have three beers while I am there.... So there you go, I'm 36 and my mom STILL worries about me.....

Also I want to remind you that after 5 years of 'suggesting' he have one, Boike finally has a blog of the farm.... Now he has a LOOOOOOOOOONG way to go to compare with mine but it's cute and you might want to check it out. That's all I have for ya kids, have a great 'gobble gobble' day and don't eat and drink too much! As Dirty Harry once said, 'A man has to know his limitations."

MY GOD JIM!!!!!! I'm a doctor not a drunk!!!!

So I was living on the edge and took a different way home from work the other day and I thought to myself, "MAN! That fart sure did stink!" KIDDING!!!! "I should stop by the new Harris Teeter, it's a grocery store, and get some beer so I can chill out and watch some college football." So I stroll in there and I was as excited as Rio De Janeiro when it was announced they landed the 2016 Olympic, This is what I saw!

OK so it's not a picture of the actual display from inside the store, still trying to figure out my new camera phone, but I think you get the point. PBR Light! I have to watch my waist line ya know...

I wanted to start out this blog entry with a BANG and if I say so myself, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.

OK back to my house, Say hello to Marvella!!!!

She's hot isn't she??????? Her first job is cutting this nasty a$$ tree down in the back yard.

My environmental scientist/arborist/genealogist/astrologist/nuclear physicist/civil engineer/chemist/nautical expert/Jedi Master in some of the finest beer on earth and all around good guy, Thompson told me that is was probably hit in the early years of it's life.



That would explain the HUGE disgusting GAP in it..... Get it? Charlie wearing a GAP sweatshirt next to a GAP in the tree!?!?!?! NEVER MIND GEEZ LOUISE!! So I feel it's my duty as a law abiding citizen of the U.S.A to take it out of it's misery! So with Marvella and my little nephew Charlie, Liz's brother Will, I cut it down...........

As the slide show blatantly indicates, the tree did not fall where I wanted it to BUT it's all good because it didn't fall on anyone or a house which is always a good thing...... IT'S ALL GROOVY kinda like Katie McBride, Cawley when this picture was taken, modeling Hysol's latest and greatest line of epoxies in 68!!!!!!! Love the hair mama!!!!!!!


The three of us, Will, Charlie and I also did other manly stuff like work on cars.

We ever let him drive one too...


Not really, his feet can't reach the pedals.


Oh and before I call it a day, there has been some confusion by some 'older' people...... When I place a picture up for all to see, most of the time it's a slide show and to see all the pictures you need to hit the play button... That my 'ANDY TIP' of the day.. I hope y'all have a great month and......

LIKE OMG!!!!!

I just got a new phone and I can 'text' someone like a 12 year old! SUPER FAST!!!!! WOO HOO!!! Here's proof. I'm texting my friend and it only took 20 secs.......

Which is a HUGE improvement from my old phone where it took 20 MINUTES!

I also got a PLASTIC shed! My Pops is so proud that he raised one of his sons to share is love for the stuff!

The 30+ years at Hysol-Dexter-Alpha-Henkel and the rest of the name changes every time they were bought out, were worth it. Not only did he get a SWEET retirement package but a son with the love of plastic! So with that homeless hitchhiker I picked up a few months ago, he just won't leave, we put the thing together.

Not much else going on at casa de McBride but I'm happy to report that I have all my hair, no babies daddy, money in the bank, a job, no crazy ex stilled pissed I got the family room couch in the divorce and finally, all of my teeth. I'd say life is pretty good......

ATTENTION! This is a public service announcement... This is why you sign a prenupt before you ever take the plunge into marriage!!!!

This is Liz's, my sister-in-law, brother Will's house...... His wife just recently left him and proceeded to take EVERYTHING with her back to West Virgina, insert joke here. LOVE RULES DOESN'T IT!?!?!?!?!? Mike and Liz got some new furniture so we loaded up my truck with the old stuff and I headed down to C-L-E-M-S-O-N, where he lives, and helped him put it in his empty living room so the poor guy had a place to freakin' sit. We then proceeded to drink a few beers and ponder life and some really funny skits from 'the Family Guy'

So summer is winding down and to be honest with ya, I thought I would have had more done but with a combination of mandatory OT and injuries to my ankle, it's been kinda a waste..... You say that you knew about the OT at work but you didn't hear about the ankle..... Well, while amassing frequent-flier miles to heaven, I was helping a lady at work fix a flat tire, I fell awkwardly on my ankle while trying to loosen up one of the lug nuts, HEY! That's the name of the mascot out at Lowes Motor speedway.

When I fell I thought I broke it because it was kinda pointing in the wrong direction but the Dr. at the urgent care center said it was just sprained really bad.

The only project I have done is clean out the garage and paint part of the floor with some paint I found while I was cleaning out all of my grandpa McBride's stuff....

CHECK IT OUT! It's from Montgomery Wards!!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!! Are they even around anymore? Look at their logo, I looked online and they stopped using that one in 1968!!!! So this paint is at least 40 years old!!!!! BUT! It's unopened and if it doesn't work so what!!!!! I'm painting the garage floor not my living room walls with it!
So I moved everything out, even the Mustang, poor thing!!!! I was surprised that I didn't find anything living underneath it,

and cleaned out the whole garage..... NOW I look like I live in the south or Emporium, PA!!!!!

I say 'poor thing' because it's not been on the road since.... Drum roll please,

Not bad lookin' huh? Keep your fingers crossed that it dries but either way, It's all good because I'm comfortably numb from smelling paint and epoxy for the last 3 hours.......

All the pictures were taken with my brand new camera!!!! The old one my brother gave me a few years ago finally crapped out... THANK YOU JESUS for Big Lots!!!!! I got a sweet one that , so far, ROCKS like the Ramones at UB in 87! I know because I was there!!!!!!!!! ALSO, I changed up the layout again. I'm a chameleon!!! Don't try to stop me!

When it rains it pours huh? My computer power supply is having ‘issues', digital camera is starting to die so I can’t take any pictures, lawn mower does not want to start and finally, my freaking Tivo is acting like it’s possessed BUT that's not going to stop me from posting a new entry on the BEST blog, even better than yours Karen, on the net!!!!!! HOLLA

WORK WORK WORK! That's all I seem to do........ I was able to take a few days off for the annual 'McBride World Tour 2009' I cruised up to western NY for my cousin's 6th wedding! KIDDING!!!!!


A good time was had by all..... One of my 55 cousins started getting shots and that was the end of me.......

SOOOOO! After that picture was taken I stumbled back to my cousin Jeff's house and 'sort of' passed out and when I woke up I realized that I had 'sort of' barfed....... Well here is the difference between me and others, I took the sheets off the bed and made a 'B' line to the washer and I also took some Febreze and sprayed the whole room..... Others would have just left it the way it was but that's not how I roll! The only mistake I made was telling Kari, who in turn, told my cousin Jeff. He made sure EVERYONE knew............. DORK!!!!!!! All day I had to endure badgering from all of the people they invited to their wedding and reception.....

Let's backtrack, I was on I-86 formerly highway 17, and I was just cruising and jammin' to some old Metallica and BOOOOOOOOM!!!!! WHAT THE!?!?!?!? I was hit by a girl who was

1. texting.
2. fell asleep.
3. was zoning out thinking about what she wanted for dinner that night.

I immediately looked in the rear view mirror and the look on her face was pricless!! She was in shock that she just hit me.... I pulled to the side of the road and she didn’t walk to my car, she ran, and asked if I was alright…. Her eyes were all bugged and everything. I said I was cool but that all depends on how much damage the back of my car is in. “Can I get an ‘amen’ from the congregation? This is all the damage she did……

WOO HOO!!! Nothing that can’t be buffed out by yours truly, I can clean a car right Steph? ANYWAYS, Jessica was her name and I could really tell she was freakin’…. I said ‘Jessica… It’s all cool….. This baby has over 120000 on it and still tickin’…. You scatched my bumber big deal…. I’m not that guy to report this to my insurance or anything…. Get back in your car and go home….. It’s all good!” See folks, that’s how I deal with life….. You do stupid stuff throughout it and you learn from it……Now if it was someone that was being a jerk or a certain person that I recently saw for the first time in like 20 years then it would have been on!!!! COPS, INSURANCE COMPANIES and FIRETRUCKS!!! Hell I would ever had the cops ‘pepper spray’ her for good measure… I bet $100 she did the speed limit the rest of the way home!!! HA HA HA HA HA!! Poor kid! Let’s hope the next person she hits is as cool as me……..

Being it was a complete wash out the last time I was at the Boike and Mese farm, I swung over to their neck of the woods with a few cases of the WORST beer NY has to offer and I was immediately placed on the tractor, with a new SWEET A$$ seat, and bush hogged their fields till sun down........ LOVE IT!!!!!! Some people have their crack, booze and any other form of addiction and there is me with my bush hoggin'!!!!!! AHHHHHH UTOPIA!!! Also, while polishing off the deck demo, I noticed that there is a poor turtle aimlessly roaming around. I figured that I took his/her home when I removed it...... I went out there this morning and it's gone.... Either

1. it found a new home or
2. something had it for dinner.

That’s my excitement for the month…… I will leave you with this image…..

DAMN SKIPPY!!!!!!!!!!! I proudly display this on my front porch.......