Wednesday, December 01, 2010

 Sorry y'all but I haven't done too much to casa de McBride this month due to having been stricken with S.A.R.S/swine flu/malaria with a little touch of scurvy... Which in turn, caused me NOT to stretch and work out every morning. The result- a pulled muscle in my back AND tearing a tendon in my hand trying to overcompensate for NOT being able move around. Plus being told by a fine young lady up in WI. that WYLIE,

 a pupper that I thought more of then most people on this Earth, is now playing in the big playground up in the sky. So there won't be any pictures of the stuff I have done to the house. So if you're just in it for the pictures, well come back next month because I feel like typing some stuff that I have NEVER said nor will I mention again. I usually have to be REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, drunk to talk about WI. but I'll make an exception to the rule on this one. YOU ARE SO LUCKY!  I figure that with her gone, a chapter in my life is now closed. Plus I want to type it so I can remember it when I'm in the nursing home. FIRST OFF! It was OUR decision to move up there. I just quit a job that SUCKED, I only lasted there 6 months before I had enough. I think we needed a 'change' and moving someplace would help achieve that. She was from West Bend, WI and, again WE, decided to move up there. So with the help of her brother Dan and their dad, we packed up a U haul and away we went. I was well established in Charlotte and it was vise verse up there. The dynamics changed because she was born and raised there and had a circle of friends and a core family. I remember that it was a very hard place to get a job because, let's face it, WI. is not the most GROWING economy in the USA. With in a month of us moving up there I landed a job I KNOW I was over qualified for but hey! It was a freakin' job. It was a 2nd shift job in a print company. HA!!!!! I sooooooo remember going to the bathroom and taking a nice long nap in one of the stalls because I was so bored..... SLEEPING on the MAN'S WATCH!!!! I also helped out her dad on a few of his jobs, he was a contractor and he taught me some cool stuff that I STILL utilize today. She worked at Chilis in Milwaukee for a little bit but eventually worked for her mom at a mail/shipping place. It was a very cool set up for her because her boss was her mom and it was a very friendly and a family atmosphere. Her brother worked there too and he had a SWEET German Sheppard, Greta and Mary had Wylie. They were part of the Mail Drop. Customers loved seeing, petting and giving treats to them..... We lived with her dad, Peachy, in his HUGE house, It had its challenges but in all everyone was happy. He lived in one end and we lived in the other. It was cool because I loved the small town atmosphere and I felt that we all looked out for each others best interests. She did her best to try to make things work between us but I think we both saw that the end of us was near... She and I only lasted like 6 months while we were up there. I think it all can be summed up with the help of Bob Dylan and the last verse of 'Tangled Up In Blue' "We always did feel the same, We just saw it from a different point of view." I moved out into my own apartment and was BOUND and DETERMINED to make a go of it MYSELF for at least a year so I could say to people "I DID IT!" My apartment consisted of stuff that people gave me which was pretty cool and, needless to say, it was bare minimum. KRIPES! I think my bed consisted of a mattress on the floor. I felt pretty alone and realized when I pulled into my Grandparent's drive way in Mansfield, OH that my closest relatives were 450 miles away from me! That's far!!! I ALWAYS dreaded going back to WI. when I was seeing family in OH. or NY. I HATED I-90 west because it meant I was going back to WI.. I made some GREAT friends up there including the Haver clan

 both Andy and his brother Scott made life easier on me by having me over for dinner and family parties. I will always remember watching the 2000 election with Scott not knowing WHO WON and drinking coffee the whole time and ANDY/Deanna and their kids were saints to me!!!! BUT I knew I had to go back under the Mason-Dixon line. I kinda just hung around but I'm pretty sure that I had a nervous break down while watching the Bills and Vikings game. Don't ask me why then, maybe a Doug Flutie sack triggered it. I just fell apart mentally and my boss and friend told me to go see a Dr. because he and others were worried about me because I just wasn't the 'happy go lucky' guy I was usually. SURE enough the Dr. said I was depressed and prescribed Paxil and some sessions with a counselor. FUN STUFF let me tell ya. I remember being so pissed that I had to take an effing drug to be 'normal'. Then and now, I still think just talking to someone was more effective then the DAMN anti-depressant I was on. The whole time I was thinking about my 'exit strategy' so I could get back home. Andy H. was gracious enough to give me a job at his machine shop so we thought it would be cool to tear apart my 65 Mustang and redo it right (when you're a teenager, ya tend to do stupid stuff to cars) because we had the tools to do it. WOO HOO!!!

 We were in the middle of that when I decided it was time, having my brother and sister-in-law say that I can have her slightly used boat helped make my decision even easier.

 Plus I will never forget my Grandpa Cawley, after I told him I was thinking about moving back, saying "Andy I really think you should do it, It would ease your mom and her sisters minds to know you were back in a happy place in your life."

 So we hastily put the Mustang back together just enough for me to put it on a trailer that I could tow with my good old truck, said good bye to a few people, tried not to cry like a baby and on Sept. 9th, 2001 I pulled into Charlotte. I was going to unpack that day and the 10th with the intention of looking for a job on the 11th. Well we all know that EVERYTHING changed that day. ANYWAYS, A few months later I got a great job at Wells Fargo and that's where I have been ever since. My Mustang is still in the same condition it was when we put it back together so I could haul it back to Charlotte.

 I want to clarify that it's SOOOOOOOOOOO easy to look back at a situation and say "I would have done that differently" KRIPES!!! Hind sight's ALWAYS 20/20. It was an experience, a chapter in my life,  I learned some valuable lessons from it that I will ALWAYS uphold:
  1. I will NEVER live with a girl before marriage, You are freakin roommates and there is nothing stopping you from saying "I'm done and outta here." With marriage (the one thing I think it's good for) you both know, "HEY I'm in it till 'death do you part' so WE need to resolve our issues and remember that we are in it for the long haul."
  2. Teepee's are pretty spacious and cozy.
  3. "KRIPES!" and "What the crap?" are pretty funny sayings and I STILL use them to get a chuckle out of people.
  4. I will NEVER live from pay check to pay check. having no money BLOWS! Call me a chick but I love security that comes with knowing I have $ in the bank to cover any emergencies that might come up.
  5. Bluegrass music is some pretty good stuff.
  6. Hey! I'm pretty good at welding aluminum.
 I think in the end we are both very happy in the way our lives are now. Mary has her husband who adores her and two little babies and a great family to support her. I have a life of being a single guy that names his power tools and is happier than a pig in poopy to play out in the yard with the goal of SOMEDAY being awarded the 'Lancaster County Yard of the Month". I view WI.=FAILURE. I'm not bitter, angry or calling anyone the ANTICHRIST, but I might work with them and as far as I know they never lived in Wisconsin. I just don't want to relive it. I know that will upset people I became friends with up there but that's how I feel and I have no desire to ever go back up there to visit. Too many bad things. Call me an 'A' hole but that's how I feel.
So there ya have it, This is MY version of what happened. Others might be different and that's groovy. As for me, You will NEVER hear me talk about this again and if you ask me then I will simply direct you to this and it will tell you all you need to know.

 Marking the 5th anniversary of living in 'L' town at casa de McBride, I will mention MONUMENTAL moments from the past 5 FREAKING years until 9-2011: This month marks the first time I got 'comfortably numb' on hot chocolate and Baileys while listening to Johnny Mathis Christmas Album. Speaking of Christmas, I hope ya have a merry one especially the people I know that, some might say, are a waste of donerable organs.

and a SWEET New Year

Tuesday, November 02, 2010

MULCH! It's what's for dinner.

NASTY!!! HUH!?!?!?! That stuff's like hot dogs, you don't know what they put in 'em. If you've followed, which I have more and more followers of my bitchin' blog each day, it in the past, you know that I use mulch for my landscaping. The stuff is cheap and I can get a ton of it using my good old truck. HA!!!! It equals out, I help mother earth by using mulch, and emit a ton of carbon in the atmosphere by driving a truck that MIGHT get 5 miles a gallon. WOO HOO!!!!! Big old Detriot V8's! Ya gotta love em'! Getting back on track, I usually go to the county dump and get a load of the stuff BUT this time, it was not the case. I went over there and was informed that they can't give me any because it's 'contaminated'!!! WHAT THE!?!?!? Did they just pull a BP on me!?!? SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Plan 'B' was initiated. Being like Magnum P.I. "T.C! Get the chopper ready!" I went to work....
About a year ago I saw that someone was having some property cleared down the road from me. Well they cleared the land and mulched up all the trees and brush. There was just a big old pile sitting there. Now if I was younger

I would have just takin' it without asking! BUT being the mature upstanding citizen I am, I found out through a Realtor who the owner of the property was and I called him. He said that he really appreciated that I called him because people were just going back there and stealing it, BUT he is trying to sell it, GOOD LUCK BUDDY!!!! He told me the price and I almost fainted! No one in their right mind would pay that much $$$$$...... So I know that in your neck of the woods, the economy is not that good BUT in beautiful Lancaster, SC, things are just fine..... As soon as the guy put the land up for sale, It was bought by someone else in about a month. SOOOOOOO I emailed the Realtor again and asked him who the new owners were. He told me and he works right down the street from me. I rode over there and talked to him. GOOD GOD PEOPLE! It was like I asked him for a kidney! He stood there perplexed and finally his son or son in law took down my # and told me would get back to me. That was a few weeks ago and like a one night stand, the call's NOT coming!

WHAT ARE WE AT PLAN 'C' NOW!?!?!?! KRIPES! There is another pile that I pass each day going in and from work. I wrote a simple letter to the guy/gal, whoever owns the house and asked if I could take some of it for my landscaping. Well I sent it and a few days later he called and I am wondering if EVERYONE is smoking 'funny' cigarettes because the guy said he wanted $45!!!! That's just KOOKY talk!!!! HA!!!! So after all of the shenanigans of the last month or so, I called up the freakin' county dump that started this WHOLE odyssey and asked, me-"Is the mulch still contaminated?" nice lady at the dump- 'no darlin' come on over and get a load of it." WOO HOO! All is right with the world!

Hey ya want to see what I 'treat' these with?

WOO HOO!!!!!

THAT'S RIGHT!!!!! I think pops got this like 20 years ago at one of the first warehouse clubs, I think the name of it was Pace. I have had it ever since so instead of spending $$$ on some leather conditioner I checked online and one of the MANY uses of WD-40 is 'treating' leather products! GIDDY UP!!!!!
$150 pair of Blundstones +
FREE 20 year old WD-40 =
one happy Andy McBride and boots that SHINE!!!

Also, after years of treating it like a rented mule, my good old Sears Craftsman finally kicked the bucket.

Remember before when Frog fixed it, well I think the engine FINALLY just gave up and did it's best Roberto Duran and said "NO MAS!" So I had a day off and decided that would be a great time to invest $100 bucks into filling up my truck and heading up to Charlotte to get a new one.....


It's a Husqvarna and keeping up with my tradition of naming power equipment, I named it in honor of one of the funniest kids I knew.

Bjorn, an exchange student from Sweden who was 'exposed' to the FREE LAND of the USA by my brother and his friends..... They got the poor kid sooooooo plaster at a drive in that he PUKED all over my dad's new Grand Marquis MMMMMMM GOOD TIMES!!!!

So let's recap. There's Marvella

And then Bjorn.

AND FINALLY, marking the 5th anniversary of living in 'L' town at casa de McBride, I will mention MONUMENTAL moments from the past 5 FREAKING years until 9-2011:
This month marks the first time I went to the county dump and was asked by the attendant "BOY!?! Where are you from cause you talk funny." Maybe because I'm a DAMN YANKEE? Have a great month and try not to write a check your butt can't cash....

Monday, October 04, 2010

WOO HOO!!!!! We just got INDOOR PLUMBING here in Lancaster county!!! Say GOODBYE to OUTHOUSES!
HA!!! Just jerkin' your chain BUT I do have something for ya involving indoor plumbing AND places you use when 'nature calls'.

My 'throne' had a tendency to rock from side to side when UMMMMM 'nature called'. Can't be having that? No matter how much I tightened the side bolts, it STILL swayed SO I had enough of worrying if I was going to fall over while trying to 'concentrate' on other things. I took the toilet off and found that the bracket holding it to the pipe was broken.

I went to Home Depot where you'll be happy to know that the lady with the 19th century chimney sweeper teeth still works, and got the stuff I needed..... I installed it and it works like a CHARM without rocking back and forth. It was all as easy as my prom date! KIDDING! I didn't go to prom but ya get the point.

Staying on the plumbing/water thing, I know that some people think they are a LUXURY to have BUT bath tub/whirlpool's are as crappy as having an 82 Chevrolet Chevette, The pumps on them leak like a freakin' terrorist getting water boarded even when you NEVER use it. I accidentally hit the stupid power button on it while cleaning. It was only on for like one or two seconds so I didn't think anymore about it BUT one morning I went into my closet and a musty smell hit me like a 2 ton heavy thing and the carpet was soaked. After saying a few 'choice' words, I knew where the water came from!!!!!!!! DAMN YOU WHIRLPOOL PUMP! DAMN YOU TO HELL!!!! I could have just unplugged the thing, this might be a little overkill, but instead I took the dang thing out, plugged up the pipes to and from the stupid thing and it's resting comfortably at it's new home.. I sure hope nobody wanted it because it's new home is somewhere at the county landfill.

So now there is no more water 'issues' and I have an electrical outlet in my closet, NOT JUST ANY OUTLET, A GFI one!!!! For what? I have no Godly idea BUT I have one just in case.. I took the opportunity to sharpen my woodworking skills and use up some stuff that just laying around the garage.

The whole 'angles thing' took me a few pieces of crown molding to get down but I finally got it! THANK GOD I have a pile of UNUSED, STILL IN THE PLASTIC crown molding to play around with.

I don't have anything else TOO exciting to tell ya. OH WAIT! I did head up to Virginia and celebrate one of my friends' 40th birthday party by busting out my old varsity jacket I haven't worn in 20+ years, Jeff Spicoli checkerboard vans, a 'never wore' STP hat and finally a SWEET Anthrax concert shirt. We soooooooooooooo partied like it was 1989! Like totally RAD!

Marking the 5th anniversary of living in 'L' town at casa de McBride, I will mention MONUMENTAL moments from the past 5 FREAKING years until 9-2011:

Today marks the first day 5 years ago that I chilled out on my HUGE front porch, cracked open an ice cold PBR, lit one of those citronella candles to keep the bugs away, threw on some Van Halen

and proceeded to get comfortably numb.

Saturday, September 04, 2010


I say it's a 'celebration, feista, páirtí, fête, zabava, feestje' of gigantic proportions because this month marks the 5 year anniversary ( I bought the house in July of 2005 but didn't move in until Sept. 2005) of yours truly moving into what we all affectionately call 'CASA DE McBRIDE'!!!!! I even have a LOGO marking this MONUMENTAL EVENT!

HA!!!!! Thank God for Picasa...... I just took a picture and did some 'effects' to it so it sorta looked official. Let's take a stroll down memory lane shall we!?!? Join me in me reliving the 'trails and tribulations' I have gone through in the last 5 years of being a homeowner! Actually I am not the owner until 2029! Till then I am Wells Fargo's BEEEEEEEEEOTTTTTTCCCCCHHHHHHHH!!!!
Wanna see what I will be doing when they mail me the 'note' stamped "PAID IN FULL"

That's right! On the front porch drinkin some PBR and yelling at the neighborhood PUNKS to "GET OFF OF MY LAWN!!!"

This is just gonna be a slide show of then and now pictures so sit back with your beverage of choice and get ready to BOOGIE! Oh and you'll pay for the whole seat but only need the edge!!!! SUNDAY SUNDAY!!!! MONSTER TRUCK FEST at the Allegany County Fair Grounds!!! HA!!!!!! FYI, make sure you say it in your monster truck voice!!!!

As you can see, the old paint on the Civic is kinda faded BUT it's ok because she has almost 150k on her AND I plan on keeping her and taking the same picture with her in it celebrating 10 years in 'L' TOWN!!! HONDAS RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULE!!!!

I NEVER use this thing AND in my next entry you'll know why but I wanted to take a picture of it because I had one when I first bought the place...

WOW!!!! Those Bradford Pears sure grow a lot!!

Yeah Yeah Yeah, I know that NASTY @$$ floor and counter tops are still there BUT they won't be there for much longer... If I forgot (which I am sure I did, matter of fact, I KNOW I DID) anything just put on your big boy/gal britches and start reading my blog from the beginning..... OH AND ya got to be like my friend Julie or my cousin's wife and start out by saying "I was bored the other night and read your blog."

AND look what I have, the check list from when I first moved in.

I've completed most of the stuff but there is ALWAYS more to do.... That's just the way I roll!!!!!!!

And being this is a year long celebration, I will mark monumental events that have occurred in the last 5 years in each blog entry until 9-2011!!!
TODAY marks the first time I mowed my lawn with a push mower and realized that it took too much energy and time so the next day I bought a ride-on with the ALL IMPORTANT cup holder to hold my adult beverage.

Well that's all I got for ya take care and ALWAYS remember to "NOT disturb your enemy when he/she is making a mistake...."

Sunday, August 08, 2010

Good day earthlings, first off I wanna say that resistance is futile OH AND take me to you're leader! WOO HOO!!!!

Set your phaser guns to 'FUN' because it's been all fun & games around casa de McBride! Let's get started.
Now I will be the first person to say that BIG LOTS rules 99.9% of the time BUT sometimes I buy something there that turns out to be CRAP! I think it's called buyer's remorse, this applies to many things, HA!!!! I just went POLITICAL on ya! Sorry about that, WHERE WERE WE??? OH YEAH, A couple of years ago I bought some plastic landscaping borders and as you can see, they weren't the prettiest things ever made,

So I decided to do something about them and one day be awarded the prestigious "Lancaster county yard of the month' award. I got some cedar borders, landscaping nails, something to kneel on because I ain't 18 any more and SHAZAM!

GEEZ! come to think about it,

I have been as busy as a groupie backstage at a Motley Crue concert in 87.

1. I installed and use quite frequently a rain barrel (40 gallons) to water my plants and the 2k day lillis that Mr. Boike gave me like 4 years ago.

I can sit here and tell ya how I am just doing my part to help out mother Earth BUT I ain't gonna waste my breath! WE ARE SOOOOOOOOOOOO SCREWED! WE, the human race, has made sooooo many things that ARE NOT BIODEGRADABLE! Speaking of that,

2. I bought a few bags of rubber mulch for the front area.

The stuff looks pretty good too.

3. Installed gutter guards:

SO I don't have this problem anymore.

4. It doesn't leak BUT I still wanted to make sure so again using my YEARS of redneck engineering, I have a degree in it ya know, I added a cover to my hot water on demand vent. FYI, I went up there at the crack of the morning because I don't know about where you live but it's been hotter then H to the E to the double L down here and I really didn't want to loose 5 lbs. in SWEAT while installing it........ I'm a fart smeller, I mean, smart feller like that....

It just OOZES ''redneck' doesn't it??? GIDDY UP!

5. The homeless guy, Adam, and I did some pruning of the trees. WOW! Trees sure do grow fast. I think it was only two summers ago I pruned them last...

6. I made some really, really, really redneck looking trestle for the roses I planted next to my shed to grow up.

HEY I made the thing out of spare parts I had and you cannot see it unless you are way in the back yard and your in the woods, KRIPES! You can't even see it from my kitchen window.

7. In my ENDLESS battle with the front ditch, KRIPES! It's like one of those EPIC wrestling matches where it was SOOOOOOOOO long they had to break to commercial and Hulk Hogan was STILL in a sleeper hold when they came back from the commercial break! ANYWAYS, I dug and installed a pipe to help.

8. Well I was going to organize my shed BUT I think I will wait until until these guys leave.

Good Call!?!??!

That's it for the time being.... I'm BEAT and going to go hit the showers because I smell like ,well like a guy that's been working outside in 95 degrees and forgot to put on some underarm deodorant. Then a committee that consists of ME, MYSELF and I have decided to take a nap....BUT before I go, I want to tell you to stay tuned because of a HUGE milestone that's coming up next month... Here's a hint, It's been 5 years in the making!!!

Sunday, July 11, 2010

“The McBride World Tour- Summer leg” is complete THANK YOU, WE LOVE YOU and be safe driving home!

In all, It was about 1525 miles from start to finish and I had a blast at every stop. Let's begin, shall we?

First stop was Mansfield, OH where I hung out with Grandma McBride....

The other person in the picture is Sue, AND GOD LOVE HER! She is such a big help with grandma, She's soooooooo going to Heaven....... You heard it here first.

Then had lunch and a beer or two with my Nana, she's 91 so I really don't blame her for not getting out of her chair the whole time I was there.

And the other person is Carol Jo who ROCKS too! She helps out Nana!!!! WOO HOO!!!!

Next stop was Allegany, NY, where I'm originally from. I was lucky enough to have an old friend, Kara, color my hair JET BLACK!

I have NEVER done something like that before,

Like the nacho cheese on the side of my mouth? It was in 95 degree heat for three hours BUT it still was yummy in my tummy! ANYWAYS, I have been thinking about it for the last few months BUT what made my decision to do it was when my mother 'frowned' on the idea and didn't like it one bit! That so made up my mind to go for it! HOUSTON, "the eagle has landed"!!!!! So with my bitchin' hair and my sweet chops, I went to the beer tent for BEER-PA-LOOZA at the famous Allegany carnival. GOOD TIMES!! I saw friends that I have not seen in like 25 years!!! I'm not going to tell ya who exactly everyone is but know that they are old friends and helped mold me into the person I am today! The 'TALL COOL ONE' MOFO! HA! I have soooooo many pictures that I am just going to make a slide show for ya. Cool?

One picture that I do have to write a little about is the one of Dave D, Todd H. and I! THANK GOD for statute of limitations because these two guys and I did stuff back in the day that would have caused me to be in jail.

And let's be honest here, can you see me in jail?

I would be the BEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOTTTTCCCCHHHHHH of cell block 'C' in 1.2 seconds....

Getting back on track, here's something for anyone that couldn't make it to BEER-PA-LOOZA.

OH YEAH! I took this while cruising on the BEAUTIFUL roads up in NY with the thought "GEE? You would think that after RAPING the fine citizens of NY with some of the highest taxes in the country, the state would make their roads a little bit better to drive on."

I also spent some time with the family a few towns over in Bolivar.

Then it was off to Emporium, PA to see my cousin

and his 'mentally unstable' wife. HA!!!!! I'm so kidding, Amanda don't punch me out the next time I see ya.... A good time was had by all whether if it was eating some YUMMY steaks that Joe grilled, being interrogated by their three kids, sitting on the porch having a few beers or watching Amanda play 'Wheel of Fortune' on the Play Station and interrupting Joe and I's conversation to ask "HEY! Can you help me solve this?"

Last but not least was Marshall, VA for some FUN at Boike and Mese farm! As always, they placed me on a tractor to bush hog one of their 25 freakin' fields!!!

Not only did I bush hog to my little heart's content but we also floated down the Shenandoah River too!!! I also got some SWEET boots that Mese and Boike wear to work outside, BUT I have a HUGE dilemma because they are soooooooooo nice that I don't want to use them for working outside. WHAT TO DO!!! The whole time there we drank some of the FINEST beers NY and PA. had to offer like Genesee, Schmidt's and Iron City. We also went to the 'Hatcher petting zoo', kidding, farm and had fun and games for the 4th.

I think this year's theme was something to do with palm trees, wife beaters, cowboy hats and kiddie pools. Am I right Janice and Mese? ANYWAYS, everyone had a blast KRIPES, Boike had sooooo much fun that we left him there!!! HA!!!!! Next year I'm busting out these babies,

let's hope no one gets impaled!!!!

Well that's it for now, time to go back outside in this HOTTER THAN THE HUBS OF HELL heat and finish putting up gutter guards, DANG I live a pretty exciting life don't I?

BY THE WAY, Did ya notice that I changed the background and design of my SWEET @$$ blog!?!?!?! You can't stop me but, only hope to contain me!!!!!

Sunday, June 06, 2010

So you want to buy a house eh??

The days of getting some beers with the guys after work will be replaced with cleaning gutters, trimming hedges AND stuff like that.....

DRUM ROLL PLEASE.............

After tearing it down and starting from scratch, what do you thing? Personally I am happy with the results. I would at this time, like to thank everyone involved in making this happen. Me, myself and I! Also I would like to also give some major props to my back which I am sure will ‘go out’ on me at anytime…… DAMN! Those RR ties are freakin’ heavy.

I don’t know what the weather has been like in your neck of the woods BUT us common folk in Lancaster county have had a few pretty violent thunder bummers. They have not caused any MAJOR damage at casa de McBride but they did cause some of the roofing to come off around the vent for my ‘hot water on demand’ unit. HA!!!!! I SAID UNIT!!!!

So I had to go up there and do some repair work to prevent a part of the ceiling clasping or anything. That would SOOOOOOO leave a mark wouldn’t it????? So it's not exactly pretty, SO WHAT? It's on the back side of the house and no one can see it. Plus it was the first time EVER that I did roof repair also it was hotter than the hubs of hell up there so I was kinda wanting to get the job done quick so I could get down from the roof and cool down.

I'll let ya know if it was successful when we get another storm. I hope it works because I sure don't want to go up there again! GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY IT WAS HOT!

Got a little ditty for ya, This happened about a week after my last entry BUT to AGONIZE Boike, I have not said anything until now. I have been having ‘issues’ with my lawn mower.

No matter what I did, the dang thing never wanted to start. I took it to Sears where I bought it and was greeted by Beavis and Butthead. MY GOD!!!! They were about as useful as a male stripper at a lesbian party.... Needless to say, I came out of there ready to explode with frustration, so I went down to see about just getting a new one like my neighbors, THAT THING IS SWEEEEEET.

The guy down at the dealer started talking to me after he saw I was looking at new ride on’s. I told him my situation and he said “I would LOVE to sell ya a new one BUT here’s the # of a guy that can work on your old one and get it running like new.” I look at the paper and it says FROG then a #... I looked kinda puzzled and the guy saw that and said “That’s his name.” HA!!!!! So I call ‘FROG’ and he has a very heavy southern accent and with my heavy YANKEE one, it was a MAJOR communication break down. I had to call him 5 times because I couldn’t understand what he was sayin’ when he was giving me directions. HA!!!! It got to a point where he was so frustrated that he handed the phone to his granddaughter. THANK GOD because I could understand her and vise verse. Well I eventually found the place and ‘FROG’ is everything you think of when picturing a good old boy. Not too many teeth in the old mouth but one of the nicest guys you’ll EVER meet. He looked at it and I think he said “It’s the valve and I will get it workin’ like new for ya.” Again, I think that's what he said, the jury is still out on that one BUT I got it back in a day and it runs like it just came off the assembly line in China where it was made by a kid who works 13 hours a day with no breaks and if he's lucky, A cup of water from the pond that is used as the run off from the surfer mine.

Well kids! That's all I got for ya this month... Remember to scratch someone's back so they don't stab yours!!! Take care of yourself and get ready for a detailed, depends on how much I remember, summary of the 'McBride World Tour'- Summer Leg with stops in OH., NY., PA. and rounding it out, VA.. You'll pay for the whole seat but only need the edge!!!


A MAN!  Some, well most, think I am a SIMPLE MAN  and if I can still do it myself, DANG NABBIT, I will! This is a guide for my n...